The Beautiful Woman
This clip is part of the sermon “The Beautiful Woman" delivered by Kevin DeYoung at Christ Covenant Church in Matthews, NC on May 11, 2025.
I have to ask this question and it’s for women and men. Let me start with the women, do you really fear the Lord? Do you much more honestly fear missing out on what the world says is valuable? Honestly do you more fear growing old or worse fear looking old? Do you fear other people’s opinions, or can you say the very heart of your moral being is that you fear to do anything that would displease the Lord? It really is this difficult and this simple.
You talk about marriage counseling, husband and wife, this is where it starts. Do you fear the Lord really, really, that your greatest fear is that you would do something that would dishonor God. Your heart is open to hear from God not only because you don’t wanna displease God, but you fear doing things in a different way because you know that’s only going to lead to pain in your life when you don’t do things God’s way.
So, this is for women who are married, this is for men who are not, it’s for girls to ask ourselves the question, wise daughters do you want to look like Proverbs 31 really. In your heart of hearts many of you are pursuing a far different picture of beauty.
Men, is this the wife you want to marry? In your heart of hearts for many of you, you could take or leave most of this stuff as long as you have the two or three other things that the world puts on your list.
I entitled this sermon The Beautiful Woman even though it ends by saying beauty is fleeting because one of the arguments, and I’ll make it more in two weeks, is that I believe you see throughout the Scriptures, and I believe you see it written on the human heart that woman are hardwired to pursue beauty. Men are hardwired to be attracted to that beauty and as woman are hardwired to pursue beauty this chapter is here to say, is this what you believe makes you beautiful and men is this what you value in the woman you want to marry and the daughters you want to raise and in the wife that you are married to, this is what beauty looks like.
And I’ll just end here if you say in your heart of hearts, you’re not really sure this actually doesn’t land on you as something very good, very excellent, very valorous, very beautiful, then you better be very careful because this is a picture of Christ himself. The Word may flesh, the wisdom of God. We read that in the beginning of the service from 1 Corinthians. “He is our wisdom, He is all of these things, Christ generous, Christ self-giving, Christ is precious, strong, humble, dignified, had no form or countenance that we should be drawn to Him and yet the beauty of holiness was all about Him. Jesus alone gives us reason to be confident about the future. The works of Christ deserve to be praised and honored in the gates so if this is not a picture of beauty to you, you may not have eyes to see what is beautiful about Christ. And so Christ deserves to be praised in the gates, and we therefore praise the virtuous woman, the excellent wife, the valorous woman who shines with all of the same reflected glory.
Proverbs 31
The Words of King Lemuel
[1] The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him:
[2] What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows?
[3] Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings.
[4] It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink,
[5] lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted.
[6] Give strong drink to the one who is perishing, and wine to those in bitter distress;
[7] let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their misery no more.
[8] Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute.
[9] Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.
The Woman Who Fears the LORD
[10] An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
[11] The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
[12] She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
[13] She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.
[14] She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar.
[15] She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.
[16] She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
[17] She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong.
[18] She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night.
[19] She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
[20] She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy.
[21] She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
[22] She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
[23] Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.
[24] She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant.
[25] Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.
[26] She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
[27] She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
[28] Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
[29] “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”
[30] Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
[31] Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. (ESV)